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Eyes up, heart open

Carla Ten Eyck

tere was her jack

So today is my oldest sister Tere’s birthday. Happy Birthday, sis! It’s a little after midnight and I was poking around facebook and then was getting all sentimental about stuff- as late night Facebok poking around can do at times… and decided that I wanted to give my oldest sister Tere a little shout out.

See, Tere is not your normal older sister. She is covered in tattoos, has many piercings, crazy bangs, an even crazier and super witty husband Charlie and I guess by the crazy gauge of one Mike Romano, she is way, way crazy, for she has about 9 cats. I only say about because I don’t remember how many she has…. which is a clear indicator that you have many!

Having a birthday after losing a parent is one of those stupid, stupid things that no one really thinks to warn you about. Oh they get you on Mother’s Day, or Christmas, or what would have been their birthday- or the dreaded Death Anniversary.

But no one tells you about your birthday, and sorry I am going to break the code and let people know how much it can suck! And yet by doing this I am pulling some major reverse psychology on myself by making it not suck… just you watch and learn!

Your birthday is the day that is not only your birthday, but the day that your Mom gave birth. I didn’t get this until I gave birth and let me tell YOU, that was a big day in my life! No, it was not my birthday it was something even bigger-

I gave someone else life.

My Mom did that for me, and she did that for my sister Tere. Tere was her Jack. Her first born- her pathway into parenthood. I get this now on so many painful, deep and crazy levels right now that I never stopped and thought about.

Until right this second. Dam this late night Facebook poking around crap! I should be in bed watching Dexter, but instead I am reflecting on my life, and my sister’s life. How important she is to me, and to everyone in my family. And how important she was to my Mom. See. I have 8 brothers and sisters. I guess Tere made it SO MUCH FUN to be a parent for my Mom that she just couldn’t get enough and had to have 8 more!!! That’s how great she was.

Tere was also there with me when I gave birth to Jack, my first born. Jack and I were talking today about when he was a tiny little baby- he is growing so tall and in no time he will be taller than me! He is almost 8. I told him the story about how I gave birth and then had a crazy experience (I didn’t go too much into detail with him) but the long and short of it is that I started bleeding out all over the labor room and had to have an emergency procedure with no anesthesia- there was blood everywhere and it was the most painful thing I have ever gone through in my life. (I did not tell Jack this) Now Dave, God love him ran out of the room so fast I would have thought there was a sale on snowboards outside or something- but my sister Tere never left my side.

She stayed with me, through the most painful experience of my life, and I am so so thankful for that.

So my sister is also an artist- she went to RISD for jewelry design and is so freaking creative. Check her blog out HERE and watch as she has a new project every week that she is creating. It’s such a cool idea and I am so excited to see how it all comes together!! After reading her post I got all nostalgic and had to write this blog post to tell her how proud of her I am, and how happy I am that it is her birthday today!!


Now go leave her some love on her blog, I’d really appreciate it!!


XOX


6 Comments

  • Way to make me cry on my birthday, sis! I was actually thinking about how sad birthdays are now that mom’s dead. Thanks mom. I’m so thankful we have each other. I love you, too.

    Reply
  • Anna Briggs

    I LOVE that you LOVE your family so much. I have a super close relationship w/ my brother & I’m so lucky he’s in my life. Your blog makes me want to go hug him.

    Reply
  • Carla, you’re awesome! My sweetie, Dave, lost his mom last fall and just had a birthday last week. We’re also expecting a new baby next month. Crazy to try and celebrate life and forget how much death sucks at the same time.

    Reply

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